Are You Living on Autopilot? How to Reconnect with Yourself
- Evelina Alvarado
- Apr 1
- 4 min read
Wait… Where Did You Go?
Have you ever driven home and realized you don’t remember the journey? Or gone through an entire day, checking off tasks, only to crash into bed feeling… disconnected?
If so, you might be living on autopilot—going through the motions, following routines, and responding to life’s demands without truly being present. While routines can be helpful (imagine having to consciously re-learn how to brush your teeth every morning), they can also make life feel empty when they take over completely.
The problem? If you don’t consciously engage with your life, it will pass by without you even noticing. Psychologist Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, the pioneer of mindfulness-based stress reduction, describes this as “falling asleep in the midst of our waking lives.” But don’t worry—just because you’ve been on autopilot doesn’t mean you have to stay there. Let’s explore how to wake up and reconnect with yourself before life speeds by.
How Do We End Up on Autopilot?
Autopilot mode is a natural survival mechanism—your brain loves efficiency. Instead of analyzing every choice, it creates habits and shortcuts so you can conserve energy for more complex decisions. But in today’s world, autopilot isn’t just about efficiency—it’s also fueled by:
Overloaded schedules → “I’m too busy to think about what I really want.”
Constant distractions → “Let me just scroll for a second… oops, it’s been an hour.”
External expectations → “I should do this because everyone else is.”
Repetitive routines → “Wake up. Work. Sleep. Repeat.”
Before you know it, days, weeks, or even years pass without deep self-reflection. You feel unfulfilled but don’t know why—because you haven’t stopped long enough to ask yourself.
Signs You’re Living on Autopilot
You go through the motions but feel disconnected from what you’re doing.
You struggle to remember why you’re doing certain things.
You feel emotionally numb or uninspired.
You fill every free moment with distractions (TV, social media, work).
You rarely pause to reflect on what you truly want.
If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not broken—just out of sync with yourself. The good news? You can break the cycle.
How to Reconnect with Yourself
Pause & Reflect: Before making changes, take a step back and ask:
Am I living in alignment with my values and desires?
Am I making choices based on what I want or what’s expected of me?
What parts of my life feel fulfilling? What feels empty?
According to Dr. Russ Harris, author of The Happiness Trap, “The more we live by our values—what truly matters to us—the more meaningful and satisfying our lives become.
Try this: Write down your top 3 personal values. Compare them to how you actually spend your time. Are they aligned?
Interrupt the Routine (Even in Small Ways):
Autopilot thrives on predictability—so breaking the cycle starts with shaking things up.
Take a different route to work.
Read a book on a topic you never explore.
Try cooking something new instead of your go-to meals.
Pause before reacting to a situation—notice your default response and try something different.
Even small shifts force your brain to wake up and engage with the present moment.
Reconnect with What Brings You Joy:
When was the last time you did something just because it made you feel alive? Not because it was “productive” or “useful”—but because it genuinely lit you up?
As children, we naturally seek joy. But as adults, we prioritize responsibilities over fulfillment. Ask yourself:
What did I love doing as a kid? What makes me lose track of time?
Then, make space for it. Schedule joy into your life like it’s a non-negotiable meeting—because it is.
Practice Mindfulness (Without Making It a Chore):
Mindfulness isn’t about sitting cross-legged for hours—it’s about being present in your daily life.
Eat without distractions → No scrolling, just tasting your food.
Take a 5-minute sensory break → What do you see, hear, feel, smell, taste?
Put your phone away for an hour → Notice how your brain reacts.
Even micro-moments of presence help pull you out of autopilot.
Stop Saying “Yes” to Things That Drain You
Many people stay stuck in routines they don’t even like because they feel obligated to. Reality check: Just because you’ve been doing something forever doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it.
Audit your commitments → Which ones energize you? Which ones feel like a chore?
Set boundaries → If something is depleting you, it’s okay to let it go.
Give yourself permission to change → You’re not the same person you were five years ago—you don’t have to live like them either.
Dr. Susan David, author of Emotional Agility, reminds us that discomfort is the price of growth—but staying stuck in a life that doesn’t fulfill you is far worse.
Final Thoughts: It’s Time to Wake Up to Your Life
Autopilot isn’t the enemy—it’s just a sign that you need a reset. By breaking routines, getting present, and reconnecting with what truly matters, you can shift from mindlessly existing to fully living. The present is a gift, that's why they call it the present. Your life is happening right now. The question is—are you actually here for it?
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