Cognitive Dissonance: Why Your Brain Struggles with Change

Why Does Change Feel So Uncomfortable?

Ever caught yourself defending a bad decision just to avoid admitting you were wrong? Or feeling uneasy when your actions don’t align with your values? That’s cognitive dissonance at work—your brain’s way of freaking out when your beliefs and behaviors don’t match up.

Coined by psychologist Leon Festinger in 1957, cognitive dissonance explains why we resist change, struggle with contradictions, and sometimes cling to outdated beliefs just to keep our mental world intact. But here’s the good news—understanding this psychological phenomenon can actually help you grow

instead of getting stuck in the discomfort.

What Is Cognitive Dissonance?

Cognitive dissonance happens when you hold two conflicting beliefs or when your actions contradict your values. Your brain hates inconsistency—it wants things to be logical, stable, and comfortable. So when a contradiction appears, it triggers mental discomfort, pushing you to resolve it somehow.

Classic Examples of Cognitive Dissonance:

You know smoking is bad, but you smoke anyway.

To reduce the discomfort, you might convince yourself: “My grandma smoked her whole life and lived to 95, so it’s probably fine.”

You want to eat healthy, but you grab fast food.

Instead of admitting you made an impulsive choice, you might say: “One meal won’t make a difference. I’ll start tomorrow.”

You believe in honesty, but you tell a little white lie.

You justify it by thinking: “It’s not really a lie if it protects their feelings.”

Why Change Feels So Hard

Cognitive dissonance is one of the biggest barriers to personal growth. When faced with new information that challenges our beliefs, we often experience psychological resistance. Instead of accepting the new reality, we:

Justify our existing beliefs ("This is fine because...”)
Avoid information that contradicts us ("I don’t want to hear it.")
Change our perception instead of our behavior ("It’s not that bad, really.")

Psychologist Carol Tavris, co-author of Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me), explains that when we’re confronted with the idea that we might be wrong, we tend to double down on our beliefs instead of changing them—because admitting fault feels like a threat to our identity.

How to Overcome Cognitive Dissonance and Grow

1. Lean Into Discomfort Instead of Avoiding It

That uneasy feeling when your beliefs are challenged? That’s growth knocking on your door. Instead of rejecting new information, ask yourself:

Why do I feel defensive right now?
Could I be wrong about this?
What’s the worst that happens if I change my mind?

2. Reframe Mistakes as Learning Opportunities

Instead of seeing inconsistencies in your beliefs as failures, view them as a sign of progress. Changing your opinion in light of new evidence isn’t weakness—it’s intelligence.

3. Expose Yourself to Different Perspectives

Read books and articles that challenge your current views.
Talk to people with different backgrounds and beliefs.
Stay open to nuance—not everything is black and white.

4. Align Your Actions with Your Values

If you believe in something but your behavior contradicts it, make small, intentional changes:

Want to be healthier? Start with one nutritious meal a day.
Value honesty? Practice telling the truth in low-stakes situations first.

Small, consistent actions make it easier for your brain to adapt to change without freaking out.

Final Thoughts

Cognitive dissonance is your brain’s way of protecting you from discomfort—but sometimes, that protection holds you back. Recognizing when it’s happening and leaning into the discomfort can be the difference between staying stuck and leveling up in life.

So next time you feel defensive, resistant, or uneasy about a new idea, pause and ask yourself: Am I rejecting this because it’s wrong, or because it challenges what I’ve always believed? Because growth doesn’t happen in your comfort zone. It happens when you dare to question yourself.